My Toast at Steph's Wedding

Hello…Most of you know that I am Stephanie’s older sister, Stacy.

I’d like to take a minute and share with you something I think is pretty amazing in the story of Steph and Jon.

Well, many of you can recall the little cotton top blonde, Stephanie. From VERY early on the child was drawn to California.

She talked about it often and longed to visit. Once, my grandparents attended a family reunion there and we didn’t get to go. I was sad, but Steph was infuriated. To this day, she still has an angry tone in her voice anytime someone mentions that trip.

When Steph was finally able to venture further west than TX, she was on a trip to NM with her best childhood buddy, Lizza. One can imagine how bittersweet it was for her to see road signs signaling ‘Los Angeles.’ We still have several pics of that road sign. I remember Steph calling me several evenings while she was there, with a slight sadness explaining how she was just so close and how she’d give anything to have just kept driving West!

Well, guess where Steph and Allison chose to vacation on their first big trip during their college years…That’s right, California. I believe Steph recorded every moment of the trip. We have footage of the sky, the trees, the beach, the traffic, and of course more road signs…so much that it slowed Mom and Dad’s computer down to the point that we had to retire it….Literally…it quit working! I can recall chatting with Steph and hearing her say, “I can finally breathe, the air here is just different, I love this place…”

Do you all see a pattern here, this connection and this pulling towards California in all the stages of Stephanie’s life….

There is a Scripture that I have loved for years and I think its just pretty cool too. It is Psalm 37:4... It tells us that God is the One who places our desires in our hearts… hold on to that thought for a second…I’ll come back to it…

See Steph, all the while that you were being drawn to the “the golden state” God was working on something too. God was pulling strings and bringing California to you. Of all the places in the world to be, Jon Roath, a tride and true California boy, ends up working at Dardanelle Pizza Hut. I see this as no accident, Here we have God placing the desire/longing for California in you early on and none of us ever understood why, but apparently your spirit knew that a gigantic piece of your heart had been there all along and huge part of your life story was there waiting. How cool is that-- a part of your soul lived there, and then God chose to bring him to you.

I believe it is no coincidence that we end up here in Eureka Springs, AR for the wedding of this couple. See when teaching about states, capitals, and their mottos, I found it interesting that California’s motto is the word, “Eureka!” and that your suppose to say it with joy----and it means “I found it!” WOW! Back to that desire placed in you…why was that there…because God was wanting you “to find it!”--- He was wanting you to find Jon, the person he created you to journey this life with…

Well Steph, “you found it,” you found the very reason you’d been drawn to California for all of these years…. and heres’ to him belonging to you until forever. I love you.

 

Tom.

This story is in no way intended to make much of me,  or to draw attention to obedience, but my hope is when the girls and I read this post in the future, we'll remember this day in Williamsport, PA and they'll recall my emotions and as I tried to decide if I'd obey the Holy Spirit's tugging or let fear rule me.... And, the reality that comes when we ultimately obey.


Today I met Tom. It's was a weird series of events that led me to get out of the car to order carryout, but im glad it happened... In a Wendy's line an older African American man wearing outdated eye glasses,  black wind suit pants, nice blue and white Nike's, a brown plaid sweater, with a jacket in a duffel bag's soft eyes met mine in passing. Immediately the Holy Spirit said, give him the $20.00 in your wallet. Of course, I looked at him again and tried to make excuses about how he may not need it. As I checked out and buckled the girls into the car, I told them what I was feeling about the man. I said what if he's not poor and handing him the money will embarrass him or worse make him angry or insecure. Mady said, "oh that would be sad if he felt like you knew he was poor."  I got in the car and God kept getting louder. With Mady saying, "mom, just listen to God," I told the girls I'd run back in and act like I was getting something and if I saw him, I'd give him the 20. I went in and he was gone... I got in the car and told the girls to be looking for him on the road.  Sure enough, he was walking across the street in a Fairfield inn parking lot. I yelled from across the rd, Sir can I speak to you for just a moment?" he said of course and walked beside my door. I explained that I don't know why but I believed God's Holy Spirit wanted me to give him $20.00. His eyes got so big and he said "oh wow, god just used you to answer a prayer of mine, I just spent my last $2 on these burgers and I prayed God would provide for me til next Wednesday." He kept on with, "you just affirmed to me that God was hearing me," I pulled out an extra ten and he was just ecstatic, he said how special it is when believers listen to that still small voice... I told him how hard it is to act when God tells us too though.  I told him how Chris and I really try to show the girls that when they are instructed to give-they should... And how when you give, blessing comes back to you, not always in the form of $, but could be something as simple as a hug from someone whose been saved. He told me his name is Tom and that he's at a place where he could use prayer. He said He's not sure where he's suppose to be in life but that  he has not lost hope!! I could tell he was truly a joyful person by his tone and expression. He said maybe he'd go back  to school. I told him I'd pray for whatever God's will in his life is to occur,   that God will  open every door necessary to make it happen,  and that he would live out what God has purposed him for! He asked my name and I said Stacy from AR and he said, Oh the Natural State, my sisters good girlfriend from long ago lives there and wants her to come for a visit. He thanked me so much, said goodbye and walked away to get the umbrella he forgot at Wendy's... He was excited to get another burger too:)

Tom, I may never see you this side of heaven again, but I want you to know, you blessed me so much. You, precious child of God, opened my eyes to the world of hurt and hunger right here in my town. Your spirit was so joyful in the midst of being down on your luck. Sir, you affirmed to me that I have no clue what life is like for so many, but that the Holy Spirit opens the doors of seeing. I will never never forget those kind eyes behind those ol glasses as you smiled and said, "I haven't lost hope!" look at you, you are so strong. I will always wish I would've helped you more, I mean, I have cried all afternoon wishing I would have bought you groceries or paid for a hotel room, this is what the good Samaritan did after all....that $30 seems so small to all the things I could of and should have done, although I know God will multiply it.  I wish I knew your story and how you got where you are today, it doesn't matter though, we will pray every door open for you precious soul and when I see you in heaven what stories we'll share.  Til then, hope life finds you well. Love.

Silly Sisters

Over the last few Bible studies the girls have been cracking me up.

We are completing the "Put On" chart, and we've started with gloves (compassion).

Yesterday, we really focused on the fact that to show compassion means to ask ourselves "how does that person feel inside this moment?" and "what could I do to make that person feel better?"

I was downstairs making breakfast and Mika ran down saying, "Momma, Momma- I just picked out my outfit, put it on,  and thought to myself, I hate these sleeves, and I wanted to holler and throw a fit, but I asked myself, how would that make my mom feel.... and so I didn't do it, Mom-I didn't throw a fit over clothes!"

Here in the Johnson Household, this was such a display of compassion by Mika. See, little Mika has a touch of OCD about how clothes fit and where their creases fall. It can get ridiculous! But, I have to say that I am quite proud of her first intentional account of compassion;)

How many days have we been in school? 18 full daysfor us!

 

 

As for my Madyson, these days she is really proactive about writing little stories and poems. She is always thinking of others, as usual...just simple things like making crafts and wanting to give them to her ballet teacher. She used her money to buy a card, saying  it was for Nana and Pops, but in the end it was a trick, it held a message for Momma! When Mika saw the swell of happiness the card brought me, she quickly said, "Mom, I'll be upstairs, I gotta write something for Nana." About 5 minutes later she came down with an envelope  from one of her birthday cards, she handed it to me, and there I found a piece of notebook paper with a rainbow on it!! She knows me well;)

 

 

Today as Mady did her independent study, she yelled, "Mom, Mom- the Bible uses similes too!!! The Lord is LIKE a strong tower!!" I had to post this on fb because if you know me, you know the joy that literary devices bring me...I am a literacy nerd, I cannot help it.

 

A sample of Mady's use of the device- internal rhyme:

"The air I breathe shouldn't be for me, it should be for the Lord, that's indeed."

Evening reading time is one of our favorite parts of the day.

 

 

Anywho, we are loving PA and homeschooling is a blast (most days;))

Fall is underway and we're ready for our AR holiday!

 

 

 

Camp Susque Nature Day

 

 

 



Mika, Fantastic Five Year Old!



Sugar Dumplin, I am so happy that you had such an amazing time at your birthday party!

Mika,

 

How do I begin to describe all the ways you add to my life?  I don't believe it to be possible, but I will try to share a few with  you.

• Did you know that you wear your heart on your sleeve? Yes, at the ripe ol age of 5, you already feel passionately about certain things and you make sure the world knows!! An example of this would be carrying your Bible to church. Many mornings rushing out the door, you say, "Wait, I've got to get my Bible!" When I insist that we just don't stress it, every family in the hills of PA awakens to your pleas "that I CAANNOT leave without my Bible..."
 
• Did you know that you hurt when other's hurt? It's true, at one of your tee-ball practices a little boy's head was split open. You cried and cried and make Daddy stay behind to help him after all the other children were told to head out. Daddy said that you told him they had to stay to make sure Gavin was okay and that you stayed by his side with tears just-a-falling. I see this trait you possess cross over into the emotional realm, as well. I notice that you watch people's eyes and you can read them. I love the way you are quick to ease the hurt of other's by a reassuring tone in your voice.
 
• Did you know you make me unafraid at night? When Daddy is away, and you and Sissy sleep in your own beds, I am scared and stay up staring into the darkness...But then the comforting sound of your little feet entering in my room brings me peace. You curl up right next to me and play with my hair (like you have since the first months of your life). With you there, I fall to sleep.
 
• Did you know that you already seek forgiveness from God when you sin? Lately, after you sin, you'll spend a moment alone and when I ask how come, you acknowledge that you just needed to pray.  Recently, when Daddy was fixing to discipline you, he found you with your Bible opened across your lap. When he asked what you were doing you responded, "Oh, just talking to God, asking Him to give you a kind heart so you won't spank me..." Daddy had to try to be stern as he disciplined you with a heart smile...
 
• Did you know that you are as stubborn as Sydney?! That's right, we think Syd is bad, Mika Johnson is right there with her. When you have your mind made up about which Barbie you are going to use, the car, the children, the husband, the house and ANYTHING messes this up, you cry and I hear the huffs and puffs and a few long moans. When I try to place wisdom in you, it is followed with some "But Mommas" or a "But I already..." 

 

• You are always so PROUD when you clean your room, you are picky about socks and their "points," you wipe your bottom multiple times per pee (meaning you potty and about 3 times before you potty again, you make a trip back to the bathroom to wipe again)
• You hate, no hate is not strong enough, you LOATHE brushing your teeth. For the last two months we've been prepping you for when you turned 5, no longer could you ask someone to brush for you! You've been 5 for two days and I've witnessed you brush alone without complaint twice now;)
• Also, your tender head is not getting any better. When I brush, even gently, you let little tears fall and ask me, "Why did God let me be tender-headed?"
• You are really good at impersonating people: at your last school, there was a little one who had a severe speech impediment, but you could understand her. To this day, you can sound just like her and you can do a "Sydney-cake" desire very good! I love to hear your Mom-voice when playing Barbies, your preacher voice when you play church, and your Diva voice when you are being dramatic. This never gets old!
• You never sit still, I'm glad we chose to homeschool, you'd have been labeled ADHD in a heart-beat!! The way we deal is to get out of your seat often and new learning occurs in little chunks.
• When I talk with you about adopting a baby/child and how you would have to share Momma, you get nervous and shake your head "No", you say not yet, you are all mine and sissys...

 

favorite color: red

favorite movie: the Lorax

favorite book: Pocahontas and the Strangers (you listen as Mady and I read it aloud for her schooling)

favorite subject: counting

favorite downtime: 4-wheeler rides with Daddy, you'll play Barbies for hours if I let you

favorite food: chicken tenders

 

Mika, I pray that God shows me how to best teach you, not only eductionally but Spiritually. I thank Him for that beautiful smile and that He'll use the stubborn, yet passionate attidtude of yours to glorify His kingdom in your future. I praise Him as I listen to you play, how blessed I am to have such an easy self-entertaining child and at night, as your little body warms me, I feel overwhelmed that you are all mine, this world has such a treat in you!

 

 

 

 

Daddy was not able to be at the birthday, BUT we celebrated with him yesterday and loved him up:

You requested chocolate gravy for your b-day breakfast!

Daddy asked you what you'd like for lunch and you quickly said. "Red Lobster"

From Thomas

From Nanna and Poppi

Add caption

Gifts from us

 

Peace; I think!

Well, as anyone who knows Mommy recalls the last few weeks have been difficult mentally for me. This is simply me wanting what's best for you guys educationally as well as for you spirit and soul. It has robbed me of too much time and I'm sorry. I'm new to this and have difficulty seperating myself from my public school mind set and the ease that accompanies homeschooling...

My dear friend, Natalie, a homeschool mom in PA kept saying just hang in there...maybe the Holy Spirit is keeping you unsettled because exactly what you want is out there. Nothing and I mean NOTHING, had given me peace....Until tonight. Out of nowhere I was led to look up Christian Light Publication (a Mennonite based curriculum) and Beautiful Feet (history through Literature). I had seen a couple of Moms' liked the CLP math in previous curriculum review discussion threads, but I had no idea they offered a full curriculum. I had no idea that everything I had envisioned for my girls was actually waiting out there.

My longings:

• Madyson's LA would hammer down on parts of speech and paragraph writing
• Her reading studies would glorify God and have a literary device focus (MY favorite thing to teach EVER) along with spelling, cursive, vocab
• Math would be INTENSE with a fact-focus.
• Science: notebooking about the world around you

YAY! CLP, everything I want, you give me!! And, you made it so easy with so many Samples to peek at!!

Now for "History WANTS" for third Grade:

• must be through the lives of characters...little to no textbooks, please!
• must include timelines, comprehension guides, and project ideas
• must cover American History since we are living in the midst of where our country's foundation was laid

Thank You, Beautiful Feet! There you were, simply waiting on the MayberryMom from my dicussion thread to say your name.

I am bouncing off the walls with excitement; joy belongs to me again finally. Mady Elyse, you just revealed that last night you were talking to God in thought and were telling Him how you miss my smile and my happiness. You said you told Him that curriculum was keeping me from being myself. Well, Sissy, I do believe He felt the same way and so tonight what I was seeking brought itself forward. Here's to a great summer and an awesome 2012-2013 school year!

BTW, because of how impressed I am with the third grade program, I'm gonna use the Kindergarten items for Lil Bit. She'll follow along with our read alouds and accompany us on a study of nature and the human body;)

Praise the King, What a happy day!

End of Year Math Assessment: Yay!!

End of Year Second Grade Test madyson Score » 93 out of 100 (93.33% ) Quiz School Take this quiz & get your score

Mady's Special God Moment

God, You are so good!! We are so excited at this very moment! Thank You for sending Dr. Erica and baby Adeleine down our street.

Yesterday, after schooling and reading part of Kisses from Katie, Madyson, you set out to accomplish a task- designing a "Donations for Africa" sign to put on our front porch. Sure I was a little reluctant to allow you  to stand on our porch and aimlessly hold a sign, but it was your way of obeying God's prompting to help others.

As I worked on lessons for today, you were upstairs digging and rounding up stuff. I could hear quite a ruckus. You came downstairs with a stack of Barbie clothes that you decided you would sell instead of people just having to donate. You were crying when you told me that you do not want -a-thing for
Christmas. You described to me that everything you would usually get should be sent to Africa. I believe your exact words were, "Momma, I have everything I need and want, they don't even have what they need. Please, Momma tell everyone to send my gifts to Africa."

I explained that actually, if they trust in Jesus, they have more than we do. They have total and complete dependence on God. When they ask God for their daily bread, they mean it, no distractions, no overabundance of choices which leads to sin. They are in absolute reliance of God, what a beautiful place to be, "So, do not worry, saying what shall we eat or what shall we drink or what shall we wear. For the pagans run after all these things and your Heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first His Kingdom and his righteousness and all these things will be given to you as well."  

Sissy, that is the key- seeking Him first. When you have no one else to depend on, seeking God to provide becomes real. Where we live, many Christians could decide to forsake Christ and leave Him, and  their daily lives would look just the same as when they called themselves believers. Because of being able to accomplish "stuff" on our own, we often don't rely on God. But His desire, no His command is to seek Him first, then He'll bless you and His blessings are not always American dollars. We cannot fathom all the kinds of blessings available when we seek God above all.

What do ya know, as you were holding that sign, God did something AMAZING. He sent a doctor on a walk down our street. She and her baby, Adeleine, decided to stop in and ask what you were using your donations for. You explained that you are saving to build a water well in Ethiopia. She said, "Guess what, I've been to Africa to build water wells and practice medicine, I can tell you a few things about it!" After our visit, she donated some money and we ran inside and jumped around with excitement. We've never met someone who inspired us and encouraged us that this process was really not terribly difficult.....so Momma's ready. Mady, once again, your heart and persistence has inspired me. Water well money, you will be headed to Africa in no time!

I love your bubble letters and your sweet sign, sure it was peiced together in a hurry. When the Good Lord tells you to do something, you don't piddle:) You went straight to work and got her done. And, Mika made one too, it is pretty funny!

 God, thank You for working in my girls' lives. They will never forget how the timing played out for Dr. Erica to walk by; it had to be You.

Celebrating Momma!

I LOVE RAINBOWS!! So Mady colored one and left it by my bedside!

Mady, you wanted this letter to surprise me on Mother's Day morning, but little sis ruined it  and spilled the beans early....you were so upset that you cried. You wanted the breakfast to wake me up. I love this letter; your heart is so sweet.

Mika, you  made me toast! yum!

Mady, you brought up chocolate milk and a slice of cinnamon apple butter braid.

 I'll never forget these words from Mady, "Momma you serve us all day, everyday...today it is our turn to serve you. I'm serious Momma, you work so hard for us, you are the best."  My eyes filled with tears and I was so thankful to be your Mom.

Okay, don't judge. I do believe these swings are for children with special needs, but they are just so fun. When we are alone at the park, the girls take advantage of them.

Yeah, Yeah, I kind of like em too!

Mady brought her dolls to the park and mothered them so well:) Btw, I love this man in the background. He is always behind the scenes making this family work. I'm indebted to him, yet he doesn't make me feel that way.

Mika's little stroller made tons of racket as we walked the loop around the park. She didn't mind one bit!

Mady chose to jog with her twins in tow because she said she wanted to be a 'healthy momma.'

Lastly, I was surprised with this tablet. It is basically a faster version of the I-pad; it has four "brains" instead of two. It is super fast and I have access to amazon and nook apps. As well as all the cool stuff the I-pad can do. I love going against name-brands (will not pay for a name), so when Chris found this, he jumped on it. I LOVE IT, but totally don't feel worthy of a technology toy.

Mother's Day was really sweet for me this year. Red Lobster for lunch is never a bad deal either, we all enjoyed that. I loved telling you girls the story of finding out we were having each of you. You listened eagerly as I shared accounts and how I feel like no gifts are necessary on this day. We should simply celebrate you girls' being given to me; you are my gifts. My cup runneth over...

My Pity-Party Week

So, the last few days I've completely skipped out on schooling the girls. Why, one may ask? Well, this is all due to brain overload.

• Homeschool Curriculum for next year: Heart of Dakota vs Veritas Press

This has plagued me day and night. I am not able to function outside of thinking about these two programs...one provides a seriously Christ-centered day, the other teaches history the way I like, English the way I've taught it, and my Mom's favorite math program. I literally read review after review after review and felt lost. Then, one pro-homeschool momma said, "Why don't you take a step back, start from square one, and ask yourself why you are homeschooling to begin with." So, that is what I did. The reason I prayed for God to open the door for us to homeschool was so that I could build my daughter's up in wisdom and give them a Christ-centered day. End of discussion....I then figured out that my Christ-centered curriculum allows for subsititutions and I can use my favorite English approach, I can use my Momma's favorite Math, and if I end up feeling history is inadequate, at least I'll know I gave the God-focused program a shot! After talking to Mom, she helped me come back to at least trying this option; if I'd never tried the full-blown everything relates back to God approach, I would spend my entire life wondering how it would of worked. I guess what boggled me was that I want the girls to be SUPER SMART and I know I can bring our learning back to God, even if it's not written into the curriculum. But like my Momma said, if I don't at least give this curriculum a shot, I'll never know how they may have grown in wisdom with it!


Do you see, do you see the way I go back and forth? I've never known anyone to be so indecisive and frankly, I'm mad that I carry this trait.

• Next question I can't stop pondering: "What am I doing for the kingdom of God BESIDES trying to raise up Godly daughters?"

I am aware that I cannot work my way to heaven, however, if we really want to do what the men who walked with Jesus did, we will not settle for just a normal existance...just loving our own and feeling slap-knee happy about it. Don't get me wrong, I love where I am at this phase, but what about everyone else who doesn't. When I look around and see people, humans, folks that were created and are loved by God just existing and hurting from circumstances, I cannot help but to lose the fuzzy warm feelings I have about how "oh-so-wonderful" life is. I'm supposed care for these people and bless  these people because God  saved and blessed me divinely. What am I doing for them?? What could I do for them? What am I not doing for them? The thought is constant and I need God to breathe peace over me.

• As if these musings don't fill my mind enough, how about finding a faith family?

I'm at a loss...I've only tried one worship service and I liked it, but Chris felt the lesson was a little "light." When you come from a Jim-Bob Baker teaching, to anything else it just really can't compare. Still yet, my mind should say, "ask not what the church can do for you, but what you can do for the church..." 

So, with all these issues floating around in my brain, phone calls don't cut it. I'm admitting I miss talking face to face with my family. I have been SSSSOOOOO strong with this move and really, I enjoy being here in PA, I just need my momma, my daddy, my sister-aunt, and my seesters. They understand that I create problems in my head and know how to say, "Turn off your brain for a minute, geez!" And, Chris is working nights this week and so daytime is sleep-time...otherwise, I would spend time infecting his brain with my weirdo-ness.

UPDATE: PRAYERS for Chris, it appears he'll be heading back to Angola sometime this summer.


This is the secular song I've been feeding my brain because of my self-induced turmoil:

Running From Me lyrics

Say a prayer for me, cause I can barely breath. I’m suffering, and I can’t take it.

Because of me, no one will ever see, this side of me, if I don’t make it,

Its like I can't wake up, its like I cant get up

its like I cant remember who I used to be

am I running from you or am I running from me?

Clear a path for me, cause i can barely see,

I’m stumbling, and I can't shake it

it's up to me to save myself from me, my enemy but I can't face it.

Its like I can't wake up, its like I cant get up

its like I cant remember who I used to be

am I running from you or am I running from me?

I’m breaking out.

OKAY.....It's over, this Pity-Party is over and I'm gonna pray my way out of this funk and start claiming peace and hope. And, I think I may now know why I'm "emotionally stressed,"  I use a b.c. that keeps me from ovulating, but when I just (like 30 sec ago) used the restroom, nature decided to visit; its all making sense now!!!!!! sorry if that's tmi;)

Lafayette

Well, Christopher is safe and sound in Lafayette, LA at the moment. Tomorrow is quite a fun day for the man who enjoys risk-taking!! He will be dropped from a helicopter after it's been spinning around several times and he'll have to swim to shore. Then he'll be turned upside down in a simulation helicopter under water and have to break free from inside.....all of this is to earn his safety thingy-majig for off-shore drilling. I'm super excited for him. I know this is right up his alley; however, it does not change the fact that he has crossed my mind at least 1000 times in the 16 hours since I've seen him. I guess you could pretty much say that I am simply put, lovestruck by the man. I adore him and am thankful to God that our paths crossed and that relationships grow. 

Tee-balling Mika's way!

Mika Johnson, weighing in at 37 pounds, and 38 inches tall...she may be the smallest player on the team, but her spunk will carry her far!

Will she triumph or fold under the pressure of playing in the dirt???

There is no doubt, she has much support coming from the stands...

A teammate has already broke...

Mika battles inside to overcome the temptation to join in all the 'dirty' fun 

She takes her position...

 YAY! You moved your feet and went for a grounder, unlike Mommy who waited for the ball to come to me! I'm so proud of you!!

 Oh no, she's caving...And she gives in...the rock collecting spirit inside her succombs...we found four rocks in her back pocket later that night;) 

Batter up!

But 1st, a little more dirt diggin'!

Love you so much!

You were really trucking it....I had so much fun cheering you on...

Whether you were dirt-diggin---rock-collectin----talking-on-a-'cell phone'-----or really playing the game, you were smiling and so were we!