Peace; I think!

Well, as anyone who knows Mommy recalls the last few weeks have been difficult mentally for me. This is simply me wanting what's best for you guys educationally as well as for you spirit and soul. It has robbed me of too much time and I'm sorry. I'm new to this and have difficulty seperating myself from my public school mind set and the ease that accompanies homeschooling...

My dear friend, Natalie, a homeschool mom in PA kept saying just hang in there...maybe the Holy Spirit is keeping you unsettled because exactly what you want is out there. Nothing and I mean NOTHING, had given me peace....Until tonight. Out of nowhere I was led to look up Christian Light Publication (a Mennonite based curriculum) and Beautiful Feet (history through Literature). I had seen a couple of Moms' liked the CLP math in previous curriculum review discussion threads, but I had no idea they offered a full curriculum. I had no idea that everything I had envisioned for my girls was actually waiting out there.

My longings:

• Madyson's LA would hammer down on parts of speech and paragraph writing
• Her reading studies would glorify God and have a literary device focus (MY favorite thing to teach EVER) along with spelling, cursive, vocab
• Math would be INTENSE with a fact-focus.
• Science: notebooking about the world around you

YAY! CLP, everything I want, you give me!! And, you made it so easy with so many Samples to peek at!!

Now for "History WANTS" for third Grade:

• must be through the lives of characters...little to no textbooks, please!
• must include timelines, comprehension guides, and project ideas
• must cover American History since we are living in the midst of where our country's foundation was laid

Thank You, Beautiful Feet! There you were, simply waiting on the MayberryMom from my dicussion thread to say your name.

I am bouncing off the walls with excitement; joy belongs to me again finally. Mady Elyse, you just revealed that last night you were talking to God in thought and were telling Him how you miss my smile and my happiness. You said you told Him that curriculum was keeping me from being myself. Well, Sissy, I do believe He felt the same way and so tonight what I was seeking brought itself forward. Here's to a great summer and an awesome 2012-2013 school year!

BTW, because of how impressed I am with the third grade program, I'm gonna use the Kindergarten items for Lil Bit. She'll follow along with our read alouds and accompany us on a study of nature and the human body;)

Praise the King, What a happy day!

End of Year Math Assessment: Yay!!

End of Year Second Grade Test madyson Score » 93 out of 100 (93.33% ) Quiz School Take this quiz & get your score

Mady's Special God Moment

God, You are so good!! We are so excited at this very moment! Thank You for sending Dr. Erica and baby Adeleine down our street.

Yesterday, after schooling and reading part of Kisses from Katie, Madyson, you set out to accomplish a task- designing a "Donations for Africa" sign to put on our front porch. Sure I was a little reluctant to allow you  to stand on our porch and aimlessly hold a sign, but it was your way of obeying God's prompting to help others.

As I worked on lessons for today, you were upstairs digging and rounding up stuff. I could hear quite a ruckus. You came downstairs with a stack of Barbie clothes that you decided you would sell instead of people just having to donate. You were crying when you told me that you do not want -a-thing for
Christmas. You described to me that everything you would usually get should be sent to Africa. I believe your exact words were, "Momma, I have everything I need and want, they don't even have what they need. Please, Momma tell everyone to send my gifts to Africa."

I explained that actually, if they trust in Jesus, they have more than we do. They have total and complete dependence on God. When they ask God for their daily bread, they mean it, no distractions, no overabundance of choices which leads to sin. They are in absolute reliance of God, what a beautiful place to be, "So, do not worry, saying what shall we eat or what shall we drink or what shall we wear. For the pagans run after all these things and your Heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first His Kingdom and his righteousness and all these things will be given to you as well."  

Sissy, that is the key- seeking Him first. When you have no one else to depend on, seeking God to provide becomes real. Where we live, many Christians could decide to forsake Christ and leave Him, and  their daily lives would look just the same as when they called themselves believers. Because of being able to accomplish "stuff" on our own, we often don't rely on God. But His desire, no His command is to seek Him first, then He'll bless you and His blessings are not always American dollars. We cannot fathom all the kinds of blessings available when we seek God above all.

What do ya know, as you were holding that sign, God did something AMAZING. He sent a doctor on a walk down our street. She and her baby, Adeleine, decided to stop in and ask what you were using your donations for. You explained that you are saving to build a water well in Ethiopia. She said, "Guess what, I've been to Africa to build water wells and practice medicine, I can tell you a few things about it!" After our visit, she donated some money and we ran inside and jumped around with excitement. We've never met someone who inspired us and encouraged us that this process was really not terribly difficult.....so Momma's ready. Mady, once again, your heart and persistence has inspired me. Water well money, you will be headed to Africa in no time!

I love your bubble letters and your sweet sign, sure it was peiced together in a hurry. When the Good Lord tells you to do something, you don't piddle:) You went straight to work and got her done. And, Mika made one too, it is pretty funny!

 God, thank You for working in my girls' lives. They will never forget how the timing played out for Dr. Erica to walk by; it had to be You.

Celebrating Momma!

I LOVE RAINBOWS!! So Mady colored one and left it by my bedside!

Mady, you wanted this letter to surprise me on Mother's Day morning, but little sis ruined it  and spilled the beans early....you were so upset that you cried. You wanted the breakfast to wake me up. I love this letter; your heart is so sweet.

Mika, you  made me toast! yum!

Mady, you brought up chocolate milk and a slice of cinnamon apple butter braid.

 I'll never forget these words from Mady, "Momma you serve us all day, everyday...today it is our turn to serve you. I'm serious Momma, you work so hard for us, you are the best."  My eyes filled with tears and I was so thankful to be your Mom.

Okay, don't judge. I do believe these swings are for children with special needs, but they are just so fun. When we are alone at the park, the girls take advantage of them.

Yeah, Yeah, I kind of like em too!

Mady brought her dolls to the park and mothered them so well:) Btw, I love this man in the background. He is always behind the scenes making this family work. I'm indebted to him, yet he doesn't make me feel that way.

Mika's little stroller made tons of racket as we walked the loop around the park. She didn't mind one bit!

Mady chose to jog with her twins in tow because she said she wanted to be a 'healthy momma.'

Lastly, I was surprised with this tablet. It is basically a faster version of the I-pad; it has four "brains" instead of two. It is super fast and I have access to amazon and nook apps. As well as all the cool stuff the I-pad can do. I love going against name-brands (will not pay for a name), so when Chris found this, he jumped on it. I LOVE IT, but totally don't feel worthy of a technology toy.

Mother's Day was really sweet for me this year. Red Lobster for lunch is never a bad deal either, we all enjoyed that. I loved telling you girls the story of finding out we were having each of you. You listened eagerly as I shared accounts and how I feel like no gifts are necessary on this day. We should simply celebrate you girls' being given to me; you are my gifts. My cup runneth over...

My Pity-Party Week

So, the last few days I've completely skipped out on schooling the girls. Why, one may ask? Well, this is all due to brain overload.

• Homeschool Curriculum for next year: Heart of Dakota vs Veritas Press

This has plagued me day and night. I am not able to function outside of thinking about these two programs...one provides a seriously Christ-centered day, the other teaches history the way I like, English the way I've taught it, and my Mom's favorite math program. I literally read review after review after review and felt lost. Then, one pro-homeschool momma said, "Why don't you take a step back, start from square one, and ask yourself why you are homeschooling to begin with." So, that is what I did. The reason I prayed for God to open the door for us to homeschool was so that I could build my daughter's up in wisdom and give them a Christ-centered day. End of discussion....I then figured out that my Christ-centered curriculum allows for subsititutions and I can use my favorite English approach, I can use my Momma's favorite Math, and if I end up feeling history is inadequate, at least I'll know I gave the God-focused program a shot! After talking to Mom, she helped me come back to at least trying this option; if I'd never tried the full-blown everything relates back to God approach, I would spend my entire life wondering how it would of worked. I guess what boggled me was that I want the girls to be SUPER SMART and I know I can bring our learning back to God, even if it's not written into the curriculum. But like my Momma said, if I don't at least give this curriculum a shot, I'll never know how they may have grown in wisdom with it!


Do you see, do you see the way I go back and forth? I've never known anyone to be so indecisive and frankly, I'm mad that I carry this trait.

• Next question I can't stop pondering: "What am I doing for the kingdom of God BESIDES trying to raise up Godly daughters?"

I am aware that I cannot work my way to heaven, however, if we really want to do what the men who walked with Jesus did, we will not settle for just a normal existance...just loving our own and feeling slap-knee happy about it. Don't get me wrong, I love where I am at this phase, but what about everyone else who doesn't. When I look around and see people, humans, folks that were created and are loved by God just existing and hurting from circumstances, I cannot help but to lose the fuzzy warm feelings I have about how "oh-so-wonderful" life is. I'm supposed care for these people and bless  these people because God  saved and blessed me divinely. What am I doing for them?? What could I do for them? What am I not doing for them? The thought is constant and I need God to breathe peace over me.

• As if these musings don't fill my mind enough, how about finding a faith family?

I'm at a loss...I've only tried one worship service and I liked it, but Chris felt the lesson was a little "light." When you come from a Jim-Bob Baker teaching, to anything else it just really can't compare. Still yet, my mind should say, "ask not what the church can do for you, but what you can do for the church..." 

So, with all these issues floating around in my brain, phone calls don't cut it. I'm admitting I miss talking face to face with my family. I have been SSSSOOOOO strong with this move and really, I enjoy being here in PA, I just need my momma, my daddy, my sister-aunt, and my seesters. They understand that I create problems in my head and know how to say, "Turn off your brain for a minute, geez!" And, Chris is working nights this week and so daytime is sleep-time...otherwise, I would spend time infecting his brain with my weirdo-ness.

UPDATE: PRAYERS for Chris, it appears he'll be heading back to Angola sometime this summer.


This is the secular song I've been feeding my brain because of my self-induced turmoil:

Running From Me lyrics

Say a prayer for me, cause I can barely breath. I’m suffering, and I can’t take it.

Because of me, no one will ever see, this side of me, if I don’t make it,

Its like I can't wake up, its like I cant get up

its like I cant remember who I used to be

am I running from you or am I running from me?

Clear a path for me, cause i can barely see,

I’m stumbling, and I can't shake it

it's up to me to save myself from me, my enemy but I can't face it.

Its like I can't wake up, its like I cant get up

its like I cant remember who I used to be

am I running from you or am I running from me?

I’m breaking out.

OKAY.....It's over, this Pity-Party is over and I'm gonna pray my way out of this funk and start claiming peace and hope. And, I think I may now know why I'm "emotionally stressed,"  I use a b.c. that keeps me from ovulating, but when I just (like 30 sec ago) used the restroom, nature decided to visit; its all making sense now!!!!!! sorry if that's tmi;)